Post Break Reflection

The break has given me time to think about what I’ve accomplished thus far, and to take general stock of what I think about the program. There are times, usually very early in the morning, when I think that I was foolish to involve myself in such a program. I ask myself, “who are you trying to kid?” 50 years old is very young, but it’s old to undertake something that is completely foreign in many ways. Technology for example, is a foreign, almost mystifying entity to a lot of people in my age range (50-60).

I often find it uncomfortable to carry on a conversation about the program I’m in with people my own age. They listen and politely nod their head, but the subject quickly changes to more comfortable territory, and I understand. What is equally interesting is that a lot of younger people who should have a basic familiarity with technology, look at me blankly when I begin to discuss my program, my coursework, and the projects we’re working on. Many have heard of on-line teaching, and some have taken courses, but most repeat back to me an experience with, or knowledge of, something more akin to correspondence courses.

My son for example, is enrolled in an “on-line” course that posts reading assignments, timelines of assignments due, a copy of the syllabus, and little more. There is some blogging, but nothing more sophisticated than that. Clearly, this is not on-line learning. Genuine on-line teaching and learning requires an engagement of knowledge and experience stored in mental orifices that I for one, never knew I possessed. It requires the willingness to accept challenge, discover, experiment, and persevere with some of the latest technology available, and apply it to teaching. Not an easy undertaking! Actually, it’s extremely ambitious.

This may sound dramatic to someone who is comfortable and experienced in the culture of technology. Yet, while I am a member of a class with varying levels of knowledge, experience and expertise, all of us have something to learn. I see it the Question Forum, in draft proposals requiring revision, and in highly charged comments made by frustrated colleagues. It makes me feel good to know that I am not alone in my feelings of frustration and inadequacy because at the same time, I am bolstered by the help and patience I receive from my fellow group members.

So I guess it’s best not to think about Webinars at 4:00AM. It’s probably not a good idea to wonder if anyone will hire me to do anything in this field at 5:00AM. I suppose I should be focusing on getting the sleep I need so that I can go to work and do a reasonably good job, walk my dogs, deal with supper, call my mom, and set time aside for a good session with my on-line coursework. I really do enjoy all of these things. I’m a half empty kind of a person so when things work out, as they generally do, I’m happily surprised. And when they don’t work out, it’s usually not as bad as I envisioned so again, I’m spared. At least for now, I’m halfway through this program and I’m still alive, so maybe I’m better off than what I thought. Of course, there’s always next week…..